Hey hey, sports fans, and welcome back to My Boys, where last we saw P.J. boarding a plane for Italy with a mystery bachelor. Was it the handsome former Cubs player, the handsome businessman or someone else handsome yet unexpected? Stay tuned!
(Spoilers are why the Cubbies haven’t won a series since 1908.)
The mystery man is… Bobby. Yep, P.J. invited him along because she still "has feelings" for him, as she confesses to Stephanie. By the way, does anyone not on television say "has feelings"? In my long and distinguished string of relationships, I’ve never once heard the phrase uttered. Maybe it’s a phrase women use with each other? I especially have trouble believing a straight shooter like P.J. wouldn’t just say she likes Bobby. It’s a perfectly acceptable word, and unambiguous to boot.
Anyway, P.J. plans to seduce Bobby ninja-style. Not with crossed sais, but by letting the ambience of Italy works its magic on his heart. Bobby, however, still considers them bros.
Not that it matters. Stephanie dumps her boyfriend Lance on day one, and instead of returning home insinuates herself into P.J.’s alone time with Bobby. What a friend. The three of them tool around Italy for two weeks with P.J. looking positively miserable. On the plane home, though, she cops to what a bad idea her whole plan was. Well, yeah. Bobby apparently spends a lot of time at his family’s villa. Italy probably isn’t so romantic to him any more.
Back in Chicago, Andy revels in his soul-less but very lucrative new job; Brendan finds out his radio station is changing formats to light rock; Kenny worries about Bobby; and Mike sleeps with a waitress at the bar. Oops. I mean, come on, he was warned. Heck, just this week I was asked why I don’t hit on the hot waitresses at my friend’s pub. The other guys warn Mike it’s because you don’t bring that drama into your safe place, but does he listen?
Of course not.
Instead, Mike sleeps with cute Terry but never calls her back, and gets the entire gang banned. Luckily, P.J. returns home then and imparts her recently learned wisdom to Terry: The boy ain’t worth it. Or something similar. All is well, though P.J. does ban Mike herself from the bar when she learns he used his bad Matthew McConaughey accent on her.