I must admit I have been looking forward to tonight’s episode of Project Runway more then any other episode….ever. Why? They are designing clothes for DRAG QUEENS!! Will it be fabulicious? We can only hope!
I kind of wish Bravo had not revealed Chris’s outfit last week, but all the same, I fell in love with his disco ball boobs all over again. I am a bit disappointed that he kept the goatee, because it broke the illusion and there are few things as horrible as sex kitten red lips paired with a chin sweater. That aside, it was great to see him again, as he introduced the Drag Queens (!!), who all had super stupendous names. I am not sure I have ever seen so much wonderousness in one place. Truly, they were a sight to behold. A 7 foot tall (without hair), sequined, heavily made up sight to behold.
The challenge is basically to go big or go home, while fitting the very specific persona of the lovely lady they’ve all chosen as their models. Afterward, their creations will be auctioned off to benefit Broadway Cares, HIV awareness organization – so, double fantastic! Terri is excited, because she’s done drag before, but most of the other designers approach it all with a good deal of trepidation. Which I find more then a little shocking and disappointing. Daniel completely misses the point, saying he’s planning on going couture. Meanwhile, Joe shrugs and likens the challenge to making Halloween costumes for his daughters. Which makes me think his daughters are unspeakably cool.
There is a montage of Blayne -liciousing everything and how it’s annoyinglicious and makes people want to barfalicious. All I can say is that if they are trying to make -licious this year’s fierce, they have sorely missed the mark. Holla at ya’ boy, my a$$. That is not going to fly, sister. And yes, I did totally just "sister" you, dear readers. It’s a drag show, get with the program! Also, how fascinating was it to see the ladies without their faces on?
This week’s over wrought drama starts with Suede’s weird third person profiled dream where his grandfather visited him and told him he needed seeds and started crop rotations on his garment, giving him the inspiration to make little lime green lettuce heads to put on the gloves he made. Yeah, it was crazy, and nowhere near as sexy as his model or as cool as her demeanor when she told him she felt "very Godzilla" in it and then asked if he was just too lazy to make sleeves. OK, that last part was actually rather mean, especially since elbow length gloves in two-way stretch material are way more difficult to make than sleeves. And no, you may not know how I know that.
Chris returns to do the rounds with Tim and I desperately wish we could have heard all the comments. The best, of course, is Tim telling Blayne that his dress looks like a pterodactyl out of a gay Jurassic Park, which Blayne thinks is the greatest compliment ever. I can only think about how well would that would reinvigorate the Jurassic Park franchise! They warn Daniel that his dress is…well, just a dress. He, predictably, snots that he likes it just as it is.
At the Runway, our usual judges are joined by RuPaul, who’s look was apparently inspired by cracked out Whitney.
Kenley – Her model was Farrah Moans, a very Marilyn inspired Queen. Which means there was a lot of glam she could have packed into that dress. Instead, she gave us a cheap halter rendition of the "Happy birthday Mr. President" dress, with black and white feathers in an over-sized collar. It was well fit and constructed, but it seemed like she played it way safe, which was really surprising for Kenley. I was let down.
Blayne – His model was Miss Understood, and with her hot pink coif and neon blue lip color, she was made for Blayne. That said, I didn’t get the wings. At all. They seemed to only serve the purpose of holding the fringe and given their droopy appearance on the runway, they didn’t even do that very well.
Joe – His model was the oh, so delightful Varla Jean Merman, who positively radiated charm and fun in a shimmering pink, sailor themed jumpsuit, cleverly accessorized to hide her bits, while carefully made to show off her assets. When drag works, it is sublime and everything from her anchor earrings to her tiny, skewed sailor cap was perfectly superb.
Stella – It’s a good dress, well made, perfectly fit and shows Stella’s POV. What isn’t represented is her model, Luisa Verde’s persona. The dress is punky goth chic and Luisa described herself as "Liz fresh out of rehab’. Liz would never pair her white diamonds with pink and black plaid.
Suede – His model is Hedda Lettuce, and she goes out of her way to make up for her commentary on Suede’s laziness by being overtly exuberant in her walk. That aside, I don’t see a whole lot of difference between what she came in wearing at the top of the episode and what Suede made her. With the exception of the sleeves, of course. It’s a Dallas inspired skirted suit. In lime green.
Daniel – He is so out that it is not even funny how out he is. Annida Greenkard, his model, is over the top flamenco and Daniel put the poor girl in a tired looking strapless cocktail dress that looked like a wardrobe remnant from Miami Vice. There is not only not a single thing drag about this dress, there is not a single thing interesting about it either. Surely they cannot keep him after this!
Terri – I think I may be in love with her model, Acid Betty. Almost as much as I am in love with her design, which I can’t even describe. It is a majestic creation inspired by some future race of geisha/samurai space pirates with a latex fetish and an abundance of AquaNet. Everywhere your eye goes, there is something more magnificent to see. And was her chest painted? Seriously. Love.
Jerell – His model was LeMay and while I think I see what he was going for, I believe his silhouette was a disaster. All it accomplished was highlighting the fact that Jerell had no idea how to cut a dress for a man. Which is a specific talent, I’m sure. However, his slim line to the knee length skirt topped by the over-sized and dramatic popable collar only served to accentuate her broad shoulders and long waist, neither of which are classically feminine traits. In shorthand: fail.
Korto – For someone who fretted and frowned as much as she did during the competition, she came up with a fabulous dress for her model, Sweetie. The structural flames and over-sized,detachable skirt deliver all the drag drama the challenge required, while also managing to cut a mini dress for a full figured gal that slimmed, lifted, contoured and highlighted all the right areas.
Keith – He made Sherry Vine look, as Michael Kors said, like a "sad chicken" It’s his messy fringe shtick, yet again, only this time I have no idea what the model is even wearing. Was that a shirt? A shrug? A wrap? What am I looking at? And, really, what is with the swatches? At least when Rami gave us the draping over and over last season, it was well done. This is just sloppy and confusing.
Leanne – She turned Sharon Needles into Judy Jetson. Which she has the legs to pull off, but I am not sure it matches her persona as much as it was what Leanne wanted to make. That aside, the skirt and collar are very well constructed. It’s the neckline that bewilders me. Is it crooked? Or just unrelentingly dull? Seriously, a box line would have been a vast improvement over the yawn inducing V-neck that went directly against the cut of the over-sized collar.
Blayne, Kenley, Suede, Stella and Leanne are all safe, leaving Terri, Joe, Korto, Keith, Jerell and Daniel to face the judges. As much as I want Terri to take this one, I am not terribly upset when Joe gets the win. His creation was simply pitch perfect to Varla’s persona while simultaneously hitting all the right notes for Drag in general and being so perfectly fit that it was astounding. The final two came down to Keith and Daniel, but confusing and tired won out over unprogressive and defensive, sending Daniel packing his bags.
What did you think of tonight’s episode? Have you ever seen anything packed with more divine gloriousness? Do you hope this becomes a regular challenge in future seasons? Can we start a petition to make this so??