Previously on The Bachelor, Jason met the families of each of the four remaining girls. The Christian Dad and Free-Spirit Mom and family-attended Dove Funeral sent Naomi home. He's now off to New Zealand with Jillian, Molly and Melissa. Who will go home… tonight?
We kick things off with montages of each girl. Jillian is funny and strong, Molly is a good kisser and very family-oriented and Melissa is fun-loving and sweet. Let's get to the overnight dates!
Jillian & Jason
Jason picks Jillian up in a helicopter and she looks super-cute in a plaid shirt, jeans and boots. They fly over the mountains and finally settle in for a mountain-top picnic. She confides that she's never had someone who gets her, she has fun with and she is physically attracted to. Jill talking-heads about their connection. I really like her. Team Jillian! Jason talking-heads about hoping that they can be more than just really good friends. I hope that doesn't mean he isn't feeling it with her because if you aren't feeling it by now, you aren't going to feel it, Jason.
That night, they head out on their fancy dinner date. Jillian is dressed like a Barbie I used to have, complete with hooker boots. I'm not criticizing, I'm just sayin'. Her dress is, like, synthetic fabric with shiny parts over her boobs and crotch. It's a little weird.
They get all schmoopy about butterflies and being excited about each other. There is some smooching and I see some tongue! Woo woo! Jillian then asks if he has something for her and he gives her an invitation to the Fantasy Suite. I have always found the "Fantasy Suite" to be a little skeezy. I mean, it's not like he only does it with one of the girls. How many couples do you think actually have sex in the Fantasy Suite? Hmmm.
Best Jillian Quote of the Night: I am ready to just be really close with him and see if we connect physically. I knew that if we spent the night together, it would be a long night. I just wanted to make sure he could handle that, handle all this fire.
Heee heee. You go, girl!
They get into the hot tub and start making out. The music goes from "the Death Star is about to attack" to "Mexican porn music." They are all over each other and the cameraman is really in love with zeroing in on a candle. Things get all hot n heavy and I get a little uncomfortable. I mean, I don't care if my boyfriend has had a million partners BEFORE me, but I'm not okay with going to New Zealand and fooling around with him, but then letting him go fool around with two other girls. Hmmm.
Molly & Jason
They appear to meet in some muddy ditch on the side of the road. Jason leads her, blindfolded, up to a giant bridge spanning a very deep ravine and tells her that they are bungee jumping. It's not bad, but it's no bungee jump from this past week's Amazing Race. That's a pretty cool date, but as Speed says, "Relationships that start under intense circumstances, they never last."
They head out for coffee and Molly talking-heads about how much her family loved Jason. She then whips out a list of questions for Jason and demands honesty. Hmmm. It's stuff like "favorite flavor of ice cream" and "what is your favorite place in the world" and "dream car," which turns out to be really cute. They laugh a lot and have a great time.
That night, they have the fancy dinner date. I enjoy Molly's ensemble a lot more than I enjoyed Jillian's. It's a very pretty blue dress. Jason talking-heads about wanting Molly to give herself over to him, instead of just being Fun Molly all the time. Jason doesn't like how it feels like he has to pull things out her, instead of her just volunteering stuff. That makes sense. He also talks to her about being more affectionate. She says that her family isn't a mushy-gushy family but just because they don't act that way doesn't mean she doesn't feel it. That's fair. She says she hasn't gotten vulnerable in front of Jason yet, but that it doesn't mean she isn't feeling it.
She then asks him "question #20," which is for a Fantasy Suite invitation. She reaches for the invitation on his lap without him giving it to her and he talking-heads that he's in for a "good night." Hmmm. Does this make anyone else uncomfortable? I'm not a prude, but great googly-moogly. They get into a rose-petal fueled bathtub.
Melissa & Jason
Do they take him right from waking up in the "Fantasy Suite" with Molly to the next date with Melissa? Because… ew. Anyway, he greets Melissa with a giant hug in some kind of park area. They are cute together but she seems so much younger than him. I'm very torn on whether I (in addition to Team Jillian) am Team Melissa or Team Molly. Hmph.
Melissa talking-heads about being worried about her lack of family time with Jason because her parents wouldn't be on TV. They take a boat ride on a beautiful yacht that used to belong to Winston Churchill. Cool. She tells him that the fact that he didn't meet her parents makes her nervous, but that she's trying to put herself out there for him. They smooch.
The boat docks and they get into a hot tub with a beeyootiful view of the mountains, sans glass in the windows. It's pretty incredible. Jason brings up her parents and she gets a little choked up about them not wanting to be a part of the show. Jason is disappointed at not getting to meet them, but says he can fall in love with Melissa without meeting her parents.
The nighttime part of the date is a fancy dinner on the river's edge in Queensland. Melissa has on… a slip? It looks a little like a slip. Over dinner, they discuss the parents thing and he makes the comment that seeing her with her friends did give him a peek into the real her because you're different with your friends than you are your parents. That's very astute of him and also very nice. He then gives her a Fantasy Suite invitation. Well. Jason doesn't mess around, does he?
Melissa and Jason drink some champagne and she talks about having fallen in love with him and he interrupts her with a kiss. Wow, that was pretty good. So I think I might be Team Jillian and Team Melissa. They make out a little more and head off to bed.
Chris & Jason
There is the requisite pointless chit-chat with Chris where Jason says lots of nice things about each woman and their respective dates. What do we expect from this? Would he really get to this point and say something like, "Molly and Melissa are awesome, but Jillian is a nutjob" or "I really think after the show, Molly spells restraining order." I mean, seriously.
Chris then shows Jason a personal video from each woman. Jillian calls him "babe," tells him she's in awe of him, and that she loves their connection. Molly thanks him for their date, tells him she's serious about this and him, and that she's looking forward to meeting Ty. Melissa says their time has been some of the greatest moments of her life, that she was scared to tell him she's in love with him, and she thanks him for being him. Hmmm.
Chris tells the three women that the remaining two will stay in New Zealand and meet Jason's family and son, but one of them will be heading home that night.
Jason comes out and has many platitudes about their beauty and how he's falling for them. I have to say, I think at this point it must be really hard for Jason. He obviously really likes all three women and has a great time with each of them and that would be really crappy to have to send someone home.
The first rose goes to… Melissa. I knew it! I figured she would be one of them. The camera keeps flashing to Molly and my boyfriend remarks that she looks like she just smelled a fart. I think she knows that she's going home. The second rose goes to… MOLLY! Awwww, nards.
I love Jillian and I am very saddened by this turn of events. I think Melissa is my pick to win, though.
Outside, Jason apologizes to Jillian and tells her he has strong feelings for her, but that their lives are too different and that he can't keep up with her or some crap like that. It's kind of crap. He just doesn't feel "it" with her and that's fine, but he should just tell her.
Jillian goes on her way and she cries in the limo, but at least she doesn't drop F-bombs. She's very classy on her exit. I'd watch a Jillian Bachelorette. She sniffles quite a bit, but that's okay. Some girls are snotty criers. I'm one of them. Solidarity, Jillian! Back at the house, Jason takes a moment and cries a little, which is very sweet of him.
He goes back inside and says he can't wait to introduce Molly and Melissa to Ty and his family.
Next week: The Women and Jason Tell All! Woot woot! And then in two weeks, both the girls meet Ty and the families. AND THEN: Deanna comes to New Zealand to get Jason back! WHA?!?!?!