Do you want Piers Morgan your way? He's entered the meat market.
The "Britain's" and "America's Got Talent" judge is greatly amused by the reception to the Burger King billboard in which he poses nude, except for red velvet draped over his manly bits.
"I kind of wanted the entire planet to be discussing my body, if you really want to know," he jokes on a call to discuss "America's Got Talent," premiering Tuesday, June 23. "It's the same logic that Marilyn Monroe used to aspire to, I think.
I have to say it's going quite well. We're only 36 hours into this campaign, and apparently it appeared in the New York Post today, it was on Perez Hilton's web site, and you guys are asking me about it. So I'd say my plan for global obsession with my torso is going quite well."
And yes, all that manly, meaty goodness is all Piers.
"My body has been the subject in the last 24 hours of extremely wild media speculation," Morgan adds. "As a former newspaper editor myself, I know how the media can do this. All I would say is, the picture speaks for itself. You must make your own conclusion — those people who've met me, I think, are totally unsurprised by the quality of my physique. But I can tell that some people in America are not wholly convinced. We'll have to leave it as one of those mysteries for a bit."
The ad supposedly advertises a cologne named Flame, a "body spray of seduction, with a hint of flame-broiled meat." Take that, Axe deodorant spray!
Yup, we're sure all the dogs around town love it.
Do you? Are you surprised by the quality of his physique?
Additional reporting by Rick Porter