Beth and Felicia have a truly nasty conversation about sex, but Beth finally realizes that Paul Young is awesome and her mother is nutso (“She cut off her own fingers to frame me for murder! Who does that?” Crazy moms do that) so she decides to throw in her lot with Paul instead of her crazy mother, which causes her crazy mother to go crazy. Sad, but on the other hand you’re having tons of sex with the fabulous Paul Young, so Happy Thanksgiving!
Lynette and Susan have this war about Paige being on a schedule, and how Susan wants to breastfeed the baby and stuff it inside her clothes and pretend that it is her baby and make it as horrible as she is, while Lynette’s point is: It’s her baby.
Susan will not cede this point, and calls Lynette a lazy mother who enjoys the sound of her baby crying. Instead of slapping the crap out of her, Lynette realizes that Susan is broken from having driven her own husband out of town with her terrible choices and personality, and from being the mother of MJ, which would kill anybody, so Lynette decides it’s more Pilgrimmy to just go ahead and let Susan ruin Paige. Happy Thanksgiving!