Vince’s ego is alienating his teammates, girlfriend, and Coach, but not the recruiter from Oklahoma Tech who invites Vince and his dad for an “unofficial visit” to campus. Where there are apparently three pools. Which, what? Anyhow, Vince and his dad play right into Oklahoma State’s hands by buying wholesale the shady s*** they are selling. (I don’t completely understand this shadiness because I have not taken the time to research NCAA recruiting rules, I am very sorry to have let you down in this arcane way). In any case, Vince excuses his absence from practice to Coach Taylor by blaming it on his mom’s drug habit which he says has returned. Oh, there is a special place in hell for kids who pretend their mom is addicted to heroin in order to placate their football coaches (granted: a very specialized hell niche, but still). Coach finds Vince’s lie out and gives him and his father a stern talking to, threatening to bench Vince if they keep up these shenanigans. But this stern talking-to doesn’t go far to heal Coach’s own hurt as he watches his team — left without a leader in their quarterback — start to implode.
Becky tries her hardest to resume a regular teen relationship with Luke, but she can’t quite do it on her own. For support, she calls in a crack team of awesome strippers who prep her for a beauty pageant, and meet her confession about her abortion with wise humor and much love, giving her exactly what she needs to tell Luke that she’s ready to try to start over with him. And yes, this “crack team of awesome strippers” is one of the more awesome things I have seen this week.
Head T.A. Derek Bishop shows up on the Taylor’s front stoop and — please take note, any man with hang-ups about how to be a man — Coach Taylor chases him off by wielding a pink and white piece of a tricycle at him. Which just goes to show, it’s not at all about the tool but about how you use it. Ahem. Anyway, once Head T.A. Derek Bishop finally cons his way into getting a moment with Julie (by telling her mother that he just wants to convince her to go back to school), it becomes very clear that his real intention is to get her back into a weird relationship with him. Julie then declares to her parents that she’s going back to school, and though they believe her, we do not and so watch with bated breath as she gets in that car that has allowed her such misguided freedom so far, and watch as she drives along, seemingly not going to school at all, and watch as she shows up on the doorstep of some man we aren’t sure who it is at first until the camera swings around and we watch as, yes, it is a dream come true, we watch as MATT SARACEN looks up at her and smiles.