The King has returned. This Friday (Sept. 16), Disney will release a 3D version of its beloved animated classic, “The Lion King.” It’s been 17 years (good lord, we’re old) since we’ve seen the movie in theaters, so we imagine there might be some other updates made to keep the movie relevant with the times:
- Whoopi Goldberg will still voice one of the hyenas, but the other hyenas will now be voiced by Elizabeth Hasselbeck and Joy Behar.
- The wildebeests will file a defamation suit for being wrongly associated with the death of Mufasa.
- Hakuna Matata will take on new meaning when creditors seize Timon and Pumbaa’s lakefront hammock for defaulting on payments.
- Pumbaa will lose his signature flatulence thanks to a new gluten free diet.
- Simba will file a paternity suit claiming that Scar is his legal father; Simba and Scar will settle the affair on “Maury Povich.” After a tense moment, it will be revealed that Scar is NOT the father.