Andy gets the idea that business is war and he’s a General, so he tries to drag everyone off for a field trip to Gettysburg for some history and inspiration. Only about half the staff agrees to go, however, and they’re not nearly as excited about it as he is. He lugs them all around the battlefield, going on and on and boring them with long lectures and some nonsense about a flag. Dwight has come along to spread the story of The Battle of Schrute Farms, which he insists was a more savage (and more Northern) battle than Gettysburg. As it turns out, TBoSF is more or less the opposite of what Dwight had built it up to be. Also, Gabe is mistaken for an Abraham Lincoln performer, and ends up stepping happily into the role.
Meanwhile, back at the office, the contingent who stayed behind suddenly find themselves asked by Robert California to brainstorm game-changing ideas. Nobody comes up with anything that isn’t totally ridiculous, but Robert finds some symbolic value in Kevin’s cookie-based ramblings and thinks he’s stumbled on a creative genius in the Accounting department. Fortunately, Ryan figures out a way to expose Kevin in the most ****ish way possible.
When the staff refuses to join Andy on a hike far afield, he goes into a snit that only passes when Jim and Darryl catch up to him and assure him that while this was a dumb idea, everyone likes him as Regional Manager. Upon hearing this, Andy gives up on the whole general thing, so that’s another victory at Gettysburg.