Is there anything more depressing than watching Amber Portwood‘s segments on “Teen Mom”? Her storyline is like a scenic rest stop on a highway to hell. At her Malibu rehab resort, we see her bonding with her daughter Leah, working on her relationship with baby daddy Gary and yearning for the day they can live together. But in real time, Amber’s serving five years in the slammer. If she sees her family at all, it’s through a glass divider.
In other news, Farrah flew home to Iowa to get her braces removed, whine and argue with her parents about where her daughter Sophia should live. Should she really move back in with her grandparents just because Debra and Michael have more free time? They should turn their attentions to Farrah’s puppy, because it’s only a matter of time before Farrah relinquishes custody of her new toy.
Things are looking up for our favorite affianced stepsiblings: Catelynn and Tyler‘s dad/roommate Butch is still observing the house rules, Catelynn is channeling her experience into a possible career as an adoption counselor, and her grandmother landed a guest spot on the show. (No word on whether it’s a recurring gig.)
Does Maci ever do anything besides register for school and crash other people’s vacations? If she doesn’t get her act together soon, she could jeopardize her chances of landing a post-“Teen Mom” reality show. (We’re pitching “Awkward Family Vacations” right now.)