Tonight (Sept. 11) was the original “Teen Mom” cast’s very last reunion special, and they signed off with a bang.
First there was Maci‘s bombshell that her angelic boyfriend, Kyle, cheated on her . Kyle!
But was he the only one?
More on that shortly. First, Maci told Dr. Drew Pinsky that she’d left Kyle after discovering flirty Facebook exchanges between Kyle and three (3) other girls on her computer.
“I didn’t give him a chance to explain,” Maci said sadly. “There was no reason to have a conversation. I just packed my stuff and left.”
The most heartbreaking aspect of this whole dirty business is that Ryan and Maci’s son, Bentley, haven’t seen each other since she walked out. And Bentley, who dotes on Kyle, hasn’t even asked about him. Ouch!
Dr. Drew barely gave Kyle a chance to defend himself, much less follow up on Maci’s hints that the two should at least have a “conversation.” Kyle merely confirmed the Facebook flirting but denied that it was cheating, and then D.Pins made him clear the couch for
the eye candy Ryan.
So remember that time Maci crashed Ryan’s family vacation ? And then invited Ryan and his new girlfriend Dalis to party with her? (Awkward.) What about that text Maci sent her ex that he’d “have more fun” with her than with Dalis?
Dalis remembers — and it turns out Ryan had some splaining of his own to do.
While Ryan squirmed, Maci became indignat.
“I really don’t think you want to go there,” she warned Dalis, “because I’m a tell you something you don’t want to hear. Dalis of course told girlfriend to bring it.
So while Ryan accused his baby mama of “trying to start drama right here on this stage,” Maci told Dalis the man in the middle texted her first, asking to meet up with her after he and Dalis had a fight.
Just as things were getting interesting, Drew shut it down. (Maybe because their dramz had nothing to do with addiction?) Even worse, he tried to set up a coffee date between the women — to Ryan’s shock and horror.
“I don’t even want to hang out with her,” he said about Maci “Why should they have to hang out?”
Breakup booty call or not, we’re pretty sure Ryan doesn’t agree with Maci’s suggestion that she and Ryan would still be together today if they hadn’t had Bentley.
Not that we’re in denial or anything, but Maci and Ryan are totally getting a spinoff reality show, right?
Drew seemed strangely skittish about mentioning the fact that Amber is in prison, but he was comforted by Jabba the Hutt‘s surprise visit. After reading a statement Amber sent from the slammer (you can read it yourself here), he “grilled” Jabba about harshing on Amber and…
When we woke up, all the kiddies were onstage, and Farrah and her daughter Sophia were talking about their dog, Taquito. So what happened to Stitch? We’ll tell you: He suffered the same fate as their first fluffball. What kind of puppy mill is Farrah operating here? Does she think puppies have an expiration date?
Drew, of course, didn’t address Farrah’s disposable dogs…in fact, he pretty much dropped the ball throughout his entire “checkup.”
Here are all the questions we wish Drew had asked:
- Does Leah visit Amber in prison?
- How close is Amber to getting her GED?
- Gary, do you have a job?
- Ryan, do you have a job?
Kyle, did you have a makeover?
- Maci, why is it OK for you to flirtext with Ryan but Kyle’s over-friendly Facebooking is considered cheating?
- Kyle, how do you feel about Maci’s flirting with Ryan?
- Ryan, two-part question: (1) Do you still live at home? and (2) do you really believe that any judge on Planet Earth or even Mars would award you joint custody of Bentley?
That’s it for us, folks — we’ll see you again when “Teen Mom 2″ and — squee! — “Teen Mom 3″ fill the gaping chasm we now call Tuesday night.