After Jose Canseco went on Twitter to announce he’d been charged with rape, people were confused. During his rant he repeatedly named his accuser, even giving away her work address and phone number.
The problem is Canseco was never actually charged with rape. An investigation was launched, but no charges were filed. Laura Meltzer, a spokesperson for the Las Vegas Metro Police Department, says the case has been closed.
Cue the gloating by Canseco. Following nonsensical tweets like “I am not a sissy pants liberal” and “I am in the middle in a shrinking huddle of sanity with you,” the former Major League Baseball slugger said he was taking a polygraph test with the police.
He later proudly announced that he passed the test and would be auctioning off the results. Really. He’ll even include a detailed account of the night the alleged incident happened.
Canseco then addressed his accuser again, giving her 48 hours to contact him to apologize or face criminal charges and a civil lawsuit. He claims the woman only made her accusation after being forced to by an ex-boyfriend.
For a little change of pace, he then asked HBO to hire Amanda Bynes to work with Danny McBride and himself on the next season of “Eastbound & Down.” Of course, Canseco isn’t actually in the next season of the show, so that might be difficult.
The never-ending circus that is Jose Canseco’s social media life continues.