And it’s not like “Teen Wolf” doesn’t set a high standard when it comes to twisted and disturbing episodes. Most of them, however, don’t begin with Stiles coming this close to having sex (before the girl is kidnapped and presumably murdered), spend a middle part with everyone torturing Isaac, and then end with feral werewolves and Lydia screaming.
Stiles, condemned to a life of celibate side-kickery
Scott and Stiles start out the episode at the birthday party of a girl named Heather. Back in pre-school, Heather and Stiles were buddies but now she goes to another school (There’s another school in Beacon Hills? Why?).
But, out of the blue, Heather invited Stiles to her 17th birthday. Why? Apparently her sole purpose was to use her old playmate for sex. Stiles is cool with this.
Unfortunately — and because Stiles is doomed to celibacy and modesty on a show full of naked chests — someone or something grabs a screaming Heather from her basement before anything happens.
Oh well, Stiles. Maybe next season!
Remember how Isaac was running from the Alpha pack and then didn’t know what was going on? He seems to have amnesia. Normally, an Alpha werewolf should be able to rip open Isaac’s back to find the hidden memories that way. But Derek doesn’t know how, and Peter isn’t much use (as usual).
At least the werewolves have their trusty and mysterious vet to turn to. The good doctor immediately suggests they dunk Isaac in an icy tub full of water, because a) this will hypnotize a werewolf and unlock memories, and b) the theme of “Teen Wolf” Season 3 seems to be “Let’s do awful things to Isaac! Yay!”
This works slightly better than ripping open Isaac’s back. Although the details are still hazy, Isaac describes finding Boyd and a female werewolf in a bank vault. The female werewolf isn’t Erica though — she’s dead. Maybe.
Once they figure out which bank to hit, Derek and Scott are good to go, right? Unless it’s a trap. It couldn’t possibly be a trap, could it?
Bruises are more useful than Derek
There is an unfortunate rift between the girls and the boys of “Teen Wolf” in “Chaos Rising.” Not only are we denied our beloved Scott-Allison pining, we also miss out on Stiles drooling over Lydia. The show needs these things.
Oh, and there’s one other problem: Those funky bruises on the girls’ arms are a major clue as to the location of the bank in which the werewolves stored Boyd and Erica. Derek isn’t about to listen to the girls though. Not that Derek is a misogynist or anything — he just doesn’t trust Lydia (“who used me to resurrect my psychotic uncle”) or Allison (“who shot about a dozen arrows in my back”).
Derek has a point.
He also misses out on a really, really big clue. That leaves Allison to investigate on her own.
Everyone — male and female — figures out that the Alphas are storing their prey in a bank that’s been closed down for months. The captives are in a vault.
But why? What’s actually going on?
Stiles, being Stiles, obsesses about why the Alphas would go to all the trouble to use a bank vault to store captives. Surprisingly, Peter is actually some help in this — the two figure out that the vault walls are made of some funky mineral that scatters moonlight. Because of that fact, none of the captives have been able to change at the full Moon for three months. This is bad.
Derek, being Derek, doesn’t have much interest in thinking or double crosses or anything beyond smashing through walls. So he does that. Inside the bank vault, Derek and Scott find Boyd … And they also find a girl named Cora. Hey, it looks like Derek has another werewolf sister!
Allison, being Allison, wanders into the bank alone and without a plan. She immediately runs into the Creepy Guidance Counselor Who Also Speaks French. Remember her? It turns out that the lady is enough of a teacher to hide Allison safely away. She’s also enough of a traitor to capture Scott and Derek in one of those magic ash circles with the crazy Boyd and Cora.
Oh, and remember how Erica was supposed to be dead? She is. She’s dead (very, very dead) in the closet with Allison. So long, Erica!
Truth and screaming
We don’t quite get a battle royale between werewolves in that ash-lined vault. Derek and Scott seem rather willing to fight and fight and fight. But Allison isn’t cool with her boyfriend getting slashed into smithereens. She breaks the ash circle.
Boyd and Cora-the-undead-Hale-sister escape — still messed-up and deadly — out into the town. But at least Scott is safe! So is Derek, hut he is less appreciative. In fact, Derek yells at Allison over her choice. He even brings up last season’s Crazy-Eyed Mom death.
Will Scott be able to tell Allison that Mom Argent only died because she was happily trying to torture him to death?
We don’t find out in “Chaos Rising.” Instead, we are treated to a familiar sight: Lydia, screaming in her bed. At least this time there’s no blood!
What does all of this mean? Why is poor Erica dead in a closet? Does Stiles ever have a chance at getting laid? Those questions remain until the next “Teen Wolf.”