During the 2014 Critics’ Choice Awards red carpet, host Aisha Tyler promises that “much like a porn film, we’re fast-forwarding to the good stuff right away,” in terms of hitting the jokes hard and fast.
Well, she did hit them hard and fast. But some were considerably better than others.
Tyler gets in some great cracks about critics, like how these awards are “a night for a bunch of people who absolutely hate movies telling you which movies they hated the least” and to Twitter users: “Our show is #CriticsChoice. If you see something you like, let us know.
See something you hate? Whine about it like a little baby.
Congratulations, you’re a critic.”
Aisha also had us giggling when she says, “I’m only gonna pay attention to the [actors] I’d like to sleep with … what’s up, Bruce Dern?”
But Tyler also makes some jokes that appear to not go over very well with the crowd, like joking that she’d like to go back to the time of “12 Years a Slave” — but she’s just kidding because today Aisha rolled up in a Porsche after a white guy made her eggs that morning … and then he took it downtown?
It was a super weird moment — and it looks like Oprah Winfrey was not amused.
Tyler later stops by the “American Hustle” table and weirdly harasses Amy Adams about her fake British accent from the film and not eating the fish, which is a call-back to a fish joke she made at the “August: Osage County” table that didn’t really land the first time either. We get it, Aisha; it’s a reference to the Julia Roberts‘ movie, but it wasn’t very funny.
There was also the joke about Meryl Streep that got told twice — that the Oscar-winning actress leaves roses and gold nuggets when she goes to the bathroom. Hmm.
Two jokes we did like were when Tyler says that Jessica Chastain is the girl she would have gotten drunk and made out with in college, and when she describes Roberts’ laugh as “rainbows and kittens playing Australian rules football in a bowl of chocolate pudding.”
To both of those things, we say, “Fair.”
How do you think Aisha Tyler did?