The semi-finals only lasted one round, so here we are gang. The finalists of “American Idol.” Let’s jump right in, shall we?
After a way-too-long, super-dramatic intro of the Idols’ audition footage while classical music plays in the background, we get to the live show. Tonight, Randy is the Thing That Ate Michael Jackson, Steven Tyler is mariachi on top, Poison on the bottom and J.Lo is a college girl dressing as a slutty dragon for Halloween.
The Idols are introduced and here are some highlights: Casey Abrams does a politician’s thumbs up that I’m sure he thinks he is doing ironically; Haley Reinhart and Kendra Chantelle have their pageant waves to go with their pageant hair; Thia Megia looks like a Cosby kid; Brett Loewenstern has his hair a little more wild and a little less Vidal Sassoon (which is a good thing); Paul McDonald has on his floral suit jacket again, which is kind of awesome; Rachel Zevita is Morticia going clubbing; Robbie Rosen is the Jonas brother they keep locked in the basement like Sloth and Julie Zorrilla is wearing her Rachel Berry best.
We finally get a explanation of how the Wild Card goes – the judges pick people to sing again for a spot in the finals. Are they doing this all during the show? That’s crazypants.
But first! A recap of what we all just watched 24 or 48 hours ago. Ughhhhhh. Then there’s a weird interview segment where all the guys seem appropriately adorable and whatnot, but c’mon. This show needed to be two hours?!
Ryan brings Scotty and Robbie to center stage. Well, Scotty is advancing, obviously. Robbie, I don’t think so. And then that’s the way it goes. On Scotty’s way over to the couch, they show a shot of his family and his sister just cries and cries, it’s the sweetest thing ever.
Next is Clint, Jordan and Jovany. OK, honestly? None of them should advance, but now I’m worried Clint did. Blech. Jordan talks about how he should’ve done John Legend’s “Ordinary People” and yes, that’s true. Why in God’s name did you choose “OMG”? Jovany’s just happy to be here, he’s such a doodlebug. I just want to hug him, he seems so earnest. But then Ryan tells all of them they are not in the Top 10. Yeah.
Now it’s the girls’ turn for a video recap of last night and the interview package. I wish I could bleep bleep bleep this, but it’s live. Bah. I can’t even switch over to something else because everything else is in reruns tonight. Booooo.
We get some results now. Ryan brings down Pia and Lauren Alaina, both of whom I’m sure are safe. And then they are, yay. That’s totally right. I love how Lauren still has that baby fat of not having had her last growth spurt yet, it makes her even more adorable. She’s a beautiful girl, but I just find that cute and young and charming.
Ryan then brings down Ta-Tynisa and Julie. Uh oh, Julie. You did not make it through. Do we even have to discuss Ta-Ty and her Rihanna debacle? Yep, that’s what happens. Julie is sure to be a Wild Card, though. She’s one of the best who flubbed last night.
The next group is Kendra, Ashthon and Karen. I predict only Karen makes it through, though I think Kendra deserves a Wild Card singing spot. And that’s what happens. Yep.
Next group is Jacob, Casey and Tim. Awww, poor Tim. He’s not through, but I hope he gets a Wild Card. And then yeah, only Jacob and Casey make it.
The next group is Thia, Naima and Lauren T. Well, only Thia is advancing, but either one of the other girls could have a Wild Card, hopefully both. Just how many will perform tonight? Hmm. Then yes, Thia is through. I should take this “Idol” psychic act on the road.
Brett and Paul are next and I’m sure Paul is through. Brett is lovely, but he wasn’t good two nights ago. I sincerely hope he gets a Wild Card and does well, Brett’s great. And then yes, Paul is through.
Rachel and Haley are the next pair. Yay for Haley, because ain’t no way Rachel is getting through. And then yes, that’s what happens. Sorry, Rachel. You’re too weird. I don’t even think she deserves a Wild Card chance, honestly.
Stefano and James are next, which is a shame because Stefano wasn’t awful two nights ago. But James is clearly in, he was amazing.
Stay tuned for more info on the Wild Card round.
When it’s Wild Card selection time, J.Lo reveals they are choosing six out of the remaining 14 Idols to sing again – three boys and three girls. The first choice is Ashthon Jones (from Randy) who does “And I’m Telling You I’m Not Going,” which is not by Jennifer Hudson, just in case you didn’t know. It’s from “Dream Girls,” but we understand the confusion.
Anyway, it’s OK but doesn’t blow me away. She doesn’t sustain the big notes long enough (too many runs) plus the one big end note was not in tune. Oh my god, there are judges comments?! That’s weird. J.Lo can’t handle the pressure and Randy compliments her attitude (which means she didn’t blow it out).
Stefano Langone (from J.Lo) is next. He does “I Need You Now” and it is unfortunately not the Alias song. But anyway, it’s good. Stefano has so much potential and he really blew it on his semi-finals night, but this was very pretty and very, very current. I bet he’s through.
Now Steven gets a pick in Kendra Chantelle and we’re sure it’s 90% that she’s good and only 10% that he wants to sex her up. She sings “Georgia On My Mind” and it starts off too low to really hear her, she must have some big high stuff planned to have to start it that low. And then yes, she hits a couple big ol’ high notes. She’s good and last night’s “Impossible” did not really show her off the best. Hopefully she keeps going in the competition.
J.Lo’s next pick is Jovany Barreto and he goes with “Angel” by Jon Secada and it is totally in his wheelhouse, plus he sings in Spanish, so he’s pandering a bit to J.Lo (like Karen, but with Karen at least J.Lo didn’t have a vote). It’s … OK, but honestly it’s not fantastic. It’s kinda boring.
Steven’s next pick is Naima Adedapo (wow, Julie Z doesn’t even get a chance, I am so surprised. Truly). She does “For All We Know” and it’s goosebump-inducing. So good, wow. I mean, I’m super happy for Naima, she’s wonderful. I’m just sad about my girl Julie. I think (based on these performances) it should’ve been Naima, Kendra and Julie in the girl Wild Card spots.
Randy has the last pick with Robbie Rosen. Huh. Did not see that coming, thought Tim Halperin or Brett Loewenstern would have a chance. Robbie sings “Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word” and it’s … slow and melodramatic. Hmmm.
Honestly, I think the three Wild Cards should be Kendra, Stefano and Naima. We shall see.
Back from the break, J.Lo and the guys tell Ryan they need more time (yeah, uh huh) so that they roll J.Lo’s “On the Floor” video while the judges deliberate. Sure, that is totally spontaneous and not at all planned.
Finally we get the last spots – Randy picks Ashthon (um, what? Seriously. What?), J.Lo picks Stefano (yep) and Steven picks Naima (after saying, “I wish we could do all of them.” Steven, don’t let your personal thoughts about the contestants spill into the show).
So here is your Top 13 – Casey Abrams, Naima Adedapo, Lauren Alaina, James Durbin, Ashthon Jones, Stefano Langone, Jacob Lusk, Scotty McCreery, Paul McDonald, Thia Megia, Haley Reinhart, Karen Rodriguez and Pia Toscano.