While Sutton rots away in Vegas juvie, Travis promises Emma he’ll leave if she steals from her (well, Sutton’s) friends and family. Anxious to keep her old life from bleeding into the new one, she distances herself from Ethan and from Mads, who has learned that Eduardo was relocated to a new, secret hospital at his mother’s behest. Unfortunately, when Emma goes a-thievin’ for Travis (only giving him costume jewelry), he decides to seal the deal with a sexual assaultalicious kiss, which Ethan happens to see and totally misconstrues.
Now that Ted and Kristin know about Justin’s situation, Ted offers to find Justin a home over the golf club and a job to earn his room and board. He does this under the false impression that Justin was a gentleman with Laurel and half-jokes-mostly-threatens Justin that he’ll murder him with one of his very own golf clubs if he founds there’s any hanky panky going on. Since their daughters have proven so trustworthy in the past few weeks, Ted decides to take Kristin on a romantic getaway (read: plastic surgeon’s conference, ooh la la!) to Sedona. Laurel’s first response says it all: “We are so going to blow the roof off this place!” While there, they run into an old associate of Ted’s who mistakenly calls Kristin “Annie” and references a rager of a weekend in Santa Barbara. Kristin grows fixated on Annie Sewell (who was Hobbs?) and discovers that someone ripped a page out of the family scrapbook, though she remains ever clueless.
So, while the ‘rents are gone, obviously the best thing for Emma to do when she’s hiding about a million things at once is to get wasted drunk and play a game of “Never Have I Ever.” Emma manages not to reveal anything scandalous to the group, but she does reveal practically all her cards to Ethan when she’s all, “Let’s just do it already.” Travis shows up in the middle of the night to collect some real jewelry and Emma’s chastity. Of course Ethan is lurking around, and shortly thereafter — as Emma puts it — they’re in a Coen brothers movie. Or at least the ABC Family version. As they cart Travis’s unconscious ass outside, Emma inadvertently mentions that the phone was ringing right before Travis showed up. They look at the caller ID and piece it together that Sutton is in the twink clink.