In the world of “The Late Show With David Letterman” everyone is fair game when it comes to the Top 10 List mockery.
Naturally, that means Letterman’s own confession Thursday night to having sexual affairs with some of his show staffers is begging for the Top 10 treatment.
We had so much fun compiling our other list (Top 10 reasons why David Letterman finally married Regina Lasko) and we wanted to beat Dave to the punch, so we present:
Top 10 reasons I, David Letterman, confessed to affairs on “The Late Show”
10. Needed a sex scandal like Mark Sanford so I could get my own Top 10 list.
9. Couldn’t cough up the $2 mil ever since I paid Oprah to come on my show.
8. Wanted to show Bill Clinton how it’s done.
7. It’s easier than writing a memoir.
6. Hoping to get my story retold on “Law & Order.”
5. Wanted to take over Regis’ title of Sexiest Talk Show Host.
4. I hear Lady Gaga likes the bad boys.
3. Needed a ratings boost against “The Tonight Show” … oh, wait. Never mind.
2. Jon and Kate Gosselin were hogging the spotlight. When is my turn on “Larry King”?
1. My Twitter account was down.
— contributions by Joseph Kapsch, Brill Bundy, Rick Porter, Hanh Nguyen & Korbi Ghosh
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