On Thursday (April 10), Ellen DeGeneres uses the opening of her talk show, “The Ellen DeGeneres Show,” to address the rumors that she could be one of the people in line to replace David Letterman on “The Late Show.”
“I am very flattered, but I really love doing my daytime show. And nighttime is very different. There’s a lot of political humor, which I don’t do,” says DeGeneres. “But I feel you don’t know if you’re good at something until you try it. So I’m gonna see what it would look like if I did do a late night show.”
The daytime host then launches in her version of a late-night monologue:
“Hey, it’s been really hot in L.A. this week. So hot Steven Tyler only wore 9 scarves. Well, let’s get to the news. So much happening in politics right now. Europe. Asia. Hillary Clinton. Am I right? Hey have you heard about this? The White House announced that 7 million people have signed up for coverage under Obamacare. Although if they really wanna cover people they should make hospital gowns that close in the back.
“Here, this is interesting. Last month Colorado made 3.5 million dollars in profit from marijuana. And if you ask me, that number, just like everyone in Colorado, is super high. Right Paul?”
She then does her version of a Top Ten list, though Ellen’s is Top Eleven and it’s her Top Eleven Pets. That’s it, just their names. It’s funny, though hard to convey in type. Just watch the video.
DeGeneres is obviously just have a bit of fun. Her daytime contract runs through 2017, so she’s really not a frontrunner for Dave’s job. (Update: CBS announced Thursday that Stephen Colbert will take over for Letterman in 2015.)
Ellen ends the bit with a serious message for Letterman, “I would like to say, David Letterman, you are an incredibly brilliant and clever man. I’ve always been a fan I loved watching you. You’ve made us happy for over 30 years. So what better song to dedicate to you than Pharrell Williams’ ‘Happy.'”