This weekend at the Human Rights Campaign Dinner in Seattle, actor Wentworth Miller, who recently came out of the closet publicly for the first time, spoke to the crowd about his experience as a closeted young man.
TMZ has the full video of Miller’s speech and it’s definitely worth a watch. But the first segment is the most touching, as he talks about trying to kill himself when he was a closeted gay teen.
Speaking the right way, standing the right way, holding your wrist the right way. Every day was a test and there were a thousand ways to fail. A thousand ways to betray yourself. To not live up to someone else’s standard of what was acceptable, what was normal. And when you failed the test, which was guaranteed, there was a price to pay. … Like many of you, I paid that price.
The first time that I tried to kill myself, I was 15. I waited until my family went away for the weekend and I was alone in the house and I swallowed a bottle of pills. … When someone asked me if that was a cry for help, I said no, because I told no one. You only cry for help if there’s help to cry for. I wanted out.
Field says during her speech, “You all have
fought for [Sam] as surely as if you were one of his parents. You’ve
changed and are changing the lives of little boys and girls who realize
somewhere along the way they’re just different from their other brothers
and sisters — and so the f*** what?”