Dirty Laundry: Jennifer's chin meets Owen's nose, Madge does English country Xmas

Jennifera_jean_56357802_600 Dirty Laundry: We scour the Web for the latest dirt. So you don't have to.

What would the love child of "Marley and Me" stars Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson look like? Click here to see Tyler Durden's admittedly poorly Photoshopped House of Genetic Horrors.

Is it just me or does this look like that freaky old lady puppet, Madame?

What did the photographer tell Aniston for her nude GQ shoot about working (sitting on) the naked male models? "Think of them as furniture." You know, like you used to do with Brad Pitt.

Contrary to popular rumors, Avril Lavigne is not pregnant. How do we know this? Because she's been seen boozing it up at Tao in Las Vegas. Whew, thank heavens!

According to the Daily Mail, Madonna will not, we repeat, not eat organic turkey with her kids and Guy Ritchie on Christmas Day.  She may have caved to her ex Ritchie's demand that she let the kids spend the holidays with him in the English countryside. But according to a source, Madonna will be having fish and steamed veggies, just like she had last Xmas.

Only difference then was everyone else had to eat the same delish thing.

Oh, and Madge, on a short break from her tour, will also be working out on Christmas Day. Guess that means no Ex-Sex for Guy!

Speaking of working out on Xmas, Michael Phelps is letting his swimmer's bod go.

"I'm out of shape right now," a grinning Phelps, 23, told Stephen Colbert on "The Colbert Report."

Phelps says he now weighs 205 pounds. What a porker! The man who even practiced for hours on Christmas Day in 2007 has been in the pool only a handful of times since the Olympics.

I see a Michael Phelps' Olympian Diet Book coming!

Photo: WireImage

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