'Glee' recap: Eff Me Gently With A Chainsaw

karofsky_3.jpgI'm just going to stick to the facts for this, lest I fly into an unseemly series of uncontrollable rages: The Glee Club's preparations for this year's Regionals are nearly derailed when news reaches the children of the recently-outed Karofsky's suicide attempt. Much chatter and soul-searching ensues, little Steffi Germanotta's new brand extension gets product-placed, St. Gay Of Lima climbs back up on his cross for a couple of scenes, Wily Sebastian gets an abrupt and unamusing image makeover, and Rachel and Frankenteen decide to push up the date of their hideously stupid nuptials because they've suddenly realized that life is for the living, or some such bull****.

Despite all this, Regionals goes on as previously scheduled, and of course New Directions triumphs over The Dalton Academy Swallows and Our Lady Of Perpetual Sorrow's Golden Goblets, despite the fact that both New Directions and The Swallows totally, totally blew. Afterwards, a freshly knocked-up Sue lets her rampaging pregnancy hormones get the better of her, and not only does she welcome Quinn back to Cheerios with open arms, she also cheerfully offers Will her assistance for this year's Nationals competition. Meanwhile, Burt, Carole, and the eminent Messrs. Berry desperately try to come up with ways to prevent their children from actually going through with their ludicrously asinine nuptials, but not one of the four is actually able to hack out a workable plan.

And then Quinn gets t-boned by a pickup truck. Fly and be free, Dianna Agron!

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