Heidi Montag wants a baby? Spencer Pratt wants a divorce!

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Heidi Montag wants a baby.

And if she gets one, Spencer Pratt wants a divorce.

"If she gets pregnant, I told her there's a divorce or adoption," he told MTV News. "If she's not down with the adoption, I think it's divorce."

 Spencer says he doesn't want a baby for the obvious reason: There's only room for one big baby in the Pratt house!

"I'm a baby. ...," he says. "And I'm not sure the world wants a Spencer Pratt spawn."

He's got a point.

 "I think I was born ready," insists Heidi. "I'm very maternal. I'm very loving. I would be the best mom ever. [Spencer feels] not quite the same, but maybe he just doesn't know he wants kids yet. I think he never wants kids, but maybe I'll have a surprise for him."

If Spencer really feels that strongly about not having children, perhaps he shouldn't give Heidi those 30 orgasms a day. 

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Did Heidi and Spencer lie about being tortured? We are soooo surprised.

Is Speidi's evil ratings plan working? Mmmwaaah-hahahahah

Speidi quits "I'm a Celebrity"? Hah. Wanna bet they'll be back tonight?

How dumb is Stephanie Pratt? Dumber than you'd think.

Photos: WireImage

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