'Knight Rider': Tiki Barber joins a fight club

Justinbruening_knightrider_240 Tonight on Knight Rider, the shadowy flight into the dangerous world of a man who does not exist came face to face with a club we cannot discuss. And yet, as this is a recap of the show, I feel compelled to discuss everything, save perhaps the club itself, as I don't want to incur anyone's wrath.

Michael's mission tonight was to discover why poor Sgt. Burber (clever way to disguise Tiki Barber's name) passed away. Burber, prior to his demise, was a drill sergeant very much in the Full Metal Jacket mold. An old, attractive, friend of Michael's, Annie, had put Michael onto the case. She knew, she just knew, that there was no way Burber had overdosed on drugs. Between her knowing and the fact that the body was bruised -- which the sheriff's report suggested happened post-mortem (an impossibility) -- and some other markings which indicated he had been strangled, it seemed as though Annie was right.

What I don't understand -- OK, one of the things I don't understand -- is how dumb the sheriff must have been. Surely something like post-mortem bruising (if that is indeed an impossibility as the show suggested) was a pretty moronic thing to write down. The basic assumption I went with here, and it proved pretty valid, is that Michael wasn't dealing with criminal masterminds this week.

In any case, KITT found a matchbook for Newcomb's Ranch, a bar, among Burber's personal doodads, and somehow Michael, miraculously, knew that it would be nearby. He said that the place "sounded" like it was close. Do the names of places change depending on the distance one is to them?

Newcomb's was run by Constance Savage, who instantly distrusted Michael. But, she still did let him in to the basement (which, according to KITT, was "radiating" more electricity than one would expect). It turned out the bar was actually the cover for a fight club (damn, I just violated rules one and two of fight club), and that there was a ton of electricity used because they were broadcasting the fights, which took place in a cage (thereby ensuring rule five of fight club) on the web.

I will admit that I was pleased that Michael instantly knew that Burber had died there. If it had taken him 20 minutes to work that out I would have been sorely disappointed. He didn't work out at that point that the sheriff was involved, which he really should have known instantly, but he'd get there eventually.

The fights were run by this pretend Navy SEAL guy, Ty, who had been booted out of film school. Ty had apparently gone around the country organizing various ridiculous battles (bums, "ghetto girls," that kind of thing). Michael "infiltrated" the "control room" for the video feed and found the tape for the day of Burber's death, but we were only about halfway into the show at that point, which meant that he had to get caught on his way out and was going to have to fight (it was his second night there and so he had already violated rule eight of fight club, but it was still definitely his turn). Michael was going to try to get out of it, but unfortunately Annie was already in the cage and ready for their co-ed tag team match. Wow. If I was buying illegal fights on the Internet, the co-ed tag teams ones are totally the ones I'd be getting (even if it does violate the fourth rule of fight club).

I hate to say this, but Michael cheated during the fight. KITT analyzed his opponent's moves and weaknesses to help Michael. Michael may have tapped out (the third rule of fight club) once Billy found footage on someone's server that indicated that "Monster," Michael's opponent, had killed Burber, but Michael still cheated. Just because he was cheating against a murderer doesn't make it right.

Annie suffered some injuries during the fight, so KITT took her to the hospital, while Michael fought to get the tape (which had been stolen from him during the fight) back. He then hightailed it away on foot and arranged for a meetup with KITT. And that was when Michael worked out that the sheriff was evil. The sheriff showed up first, pulled a gun on Michael and demanded the tape back (Sarah, Billy, and Zoe had discovered evidence showing that the sheriff was getting payouts from the fight folks). Michael escaped when KITT showed, but the sheriff had already taken Annie from the hospital back to the fight folks.

Silly sheriff. Silly fight folks. One doesn't make it personal with Michael Knight, particularly when Michael was going to learn that "Monster" didn't actually kill Burber, that it was our Navy SEAL, Ty, who didn't want Burber to beat his cash cow. Michael took down the fight promoters, sending them to jail, and the folks back at KNIGHT uploaded the video of Ty killing Burber to everyone they could think of. So, as you see, Michael's fight against these guys went on only as long as necessary (that would be rule seven of fight club).

Question of the Knight - some of the fighters went shirtless for their fights, but not Michael. I found that perplexing, didn't you? Didn't you think, as soon as you heard about the fight club (damn! Still am not supposed to say that), that Michael would be going topless (the sixth rule of fight club)?

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