'One Tree Hill': Creepy clowns and the grandmothers who love them

Antwontanner_onetreehill_s5_240Okay, One Tree Hill, what's going on here? Does Lucas love Lindsey? Or perhaps Peyton? Because heaven knows you aren't implying what I think you are with that scene between Lucas and Brooke. Right? RIGHT?

Clown-fearing spoilers below.

Five years ago today, our beloved characters graduated from Tree Hill High. Since then, they've started multi-million dollar clothing lines, launched their own eponymous magazines, coached a college basketball team to a national championship, written a successful novel, started a record label, been paralyzed, had their children kidnapped by psycho nannies, gone to marriage counseling, had fathers who were tried, convicted and served an entire sentence for murdering their brothers, volunteered to be a foster parent for sick children, and had torrid affairs with their bosses yet escaped unscathed. These kids are 23.

Let that sink in a bit. 

And...moving on. Five years ago, our beloved characters graduated from Tree Hill High, but something much more important happened: the very, very, very cute Jamie was born. Tonight's episode revolved around his fifth birthday party, and all little Jamie wanted was a Wii and to have his Grandpa Dan at his party. Everyone denies his request, because Grandpa Dan is a murderer, which completely bums little Jamie out. Dan tries to weasel an invite to the party which Nathan solidly refuses, but Dan shows up anyway and has his inevitable confrontation with ex-wife Deb. Compared to some of their previous bitchfests it comes off as a bit tame, but it's still fun. Although Deb doesn't allow Dan to enter, she does give Jamie the present he brought which turns out to be Nathan's first jersey from when he was a child. Aw. That murdering jerkwad Dan sure can be sweet sometimes. At the end of the episode, Dan reveals to Nathan that he is dying and is planning on leaving the beach house to him. Nathan acts unmoved but seems a bit shaken up. Will Dan's HCM death sentence be what brings the Scott family back together? I sure hope not, considering Dan is a MURDERER.

As for Deb, she celebrates Jamie's birthday by hiring a creepy clown (who totally freaked Haley out) and then being completely turned on by his big shoes, expanding balloons and white makeup. She proceeds to then have an "encounter" with him in the bathroom, and I officially think I now know far too much about Deb's potential porn collection. Does anyone else need some eye/ear/soul bleach?

Getting a much larger showcase this week was Skills, who is finally allowed to feel guilty about being the one who was watching Jamie when he was abducted by psycho nanny. He especially feels worried because Nathan and Haley haven't invited him over or asked him to babysit Jamie since the incident. He seeks the advice of Peyton (a friendship which I like and I hope they develop) who advises him to simply apologize to Nathan and Haley, which he does. It turns out they don't blame him for the incident at all and haven't trusted anyone with Jamie since the abduction, much to Skills' relief. To make up for not being around Jamie as much, he buys him a Wii and they end up playing Wii Tennis together, which is an awesome game. First Rock Band, now this? That Jamie is one lucky kid. Also of note: Skills was called "Antwon" twice this episode. I honestly didn't know that was his character's real name (just the actor's). Look who's a real cast member now!

Dealing with a much more delicate situation is Lucas, because Lindsey is scheduled to be at Jamie's birthday party. Lucas is still convinced he and Lindsey will end up together, although that hope is dashed when she shows up at his house after the party to collect the rest of her things and leaves her key when she goes. Lucas looks...blank when she goes, because Chad Michael Murray cannot act. Seeing as Lucas was so supremely confident she couldn't live without him and would come crawling back, I giggled heartily at this turn of events. Take that, Lucas' ridiculous confidence!

As for Peyton, she still likes Lucas. It's so boring I can't even bring myself to write any more. Please go away, Peyton, even though your hair is really, really pretty this season.

Also having a small subplot was Millicent and the repercussions of her move into Mouth's apartment. Apparently Mouth lives there with not only Skills but Fergie and Junk too (who had more lines in this episode than they've had in the entire series so far) who aren't adjusting so well to her presence. Millie takes things into her own hands to make them like her by bringing home pizza and beer, and staging a super awesome water gun fight for them. Millie, just cook and clean for them and laugh at their primitive jokes. I've lived with boys and, as archaic as it sounds, they'll love you forever.

Finally, we have Brooke. She received her first baby last week in a very sweet scene, but this week things aren't so sweet as cute little Angie is having a hard time adjusting to Brooke's care, seeing as Broke doesn't know anything about babies. Perhaps Brooke cannot take proper care of Angie because she spent like two hours squeezing herself into those tiny blue satin hot pants. They're terrible, you guys, really. Anyway, because Angie cries all the time, Brooke hasn't had a chance to work on her very important Macy's presentation and after Jamie's party turns to Lucas for help in taking care of her. He does a great job and even offers to take care of her all night while Brooke finishes. Of course, this leads to Brooke falling asleep on the couch along with Lucas and Angie. It's a cute scene, but dear God what does it mean? Are they hinting at a Brooke/Lucas pairing again? I have to admit, I really did enjoy their relationship in the past but both Lucas and Brooke have made it so obvious they've moved on that this seems a little bit crazy. Isn't two girls enough for Lucas?

What did you guys think? Are they really going there with Lucas and Brooke, or am I just crazy? How cute is little Jamie? Should Nathan forgive Dan because he only has six months to live? And what did you think about Skills finally getting his own storyline?

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