Paradise Hotel 2: Time to overthrow the government

Rahiem_paradisehotel2_240 Paradise Hotel 2 continues to shake things up, this week by throwing two new guys into the mix. Let's hope this will end the twin reign of terror inflicted by Dumb Guy and Cocky Jealous Ass.

Spoiling is caring, unless you spoil someone I want.

I refer, of course to Johnny and Raheim - and Johnny is actually the least objectionable of the two, since he just seems to be a bit of an idiot. Raheim, on the other hand, is so full of himself I'm surprised he can choke down food. Seriously, the guy needs to go.

The ladies learn about this little twist when they are whisked away to a beachside lunch. They're thrilled - both new guys seem like actual nice guys, and they could use a bit of a break from the oppressive government that theoretically rules.

About those new guys: Meet Chris, a physical trainer from Arizona, and Aaron, a student/model from Alabama. They bond with each other, bond with the girls, and seem like they'll actually be fun to hang out with. Tanya warns that we should wait to see what they're like after they haven't gotten laid for 10 days - perhaps they'll sink to everyone else's level. I hope against hope they won't.

The guys are surprised by this turn of events - they had decided that this was the week to eject Johnny. Looks like that strategy is out the window... Raheim immediately oozes over to Chris and announces that he's the Minister of Defense and Mike is PR Rep. Chris amiably says he can be president, since he's the oldest one there. Mike says sure, but Raheim takes that amiss - you can't join the government until you've been here 24 hours. Looks like we've established a rivalry.

But before Raheim can focus too much on the new guys, he has to spend some time sending out mixed messages about Stephanie - and every other woman he might someday be interested in. See, Ryan is obviously interested in Stephanie as well, and no matter how much Raheim parrots that "sharing is caring" line, he doesn't seem to think it applies to him. That night, he persistently comes on to Stephanie in bed even though she says she just wants to cuddle. The next morning, Raheim implies they had sex, but who knows if it's true. However, when Ryan says he'll back away from Stephanie since Raheim wants her, Raheim magnanimously tells Ryan he can take his shot.

So Ryan does. He and Stephanie end up in the shower together, and everyone ends up peeping in on them. Classy! Raheim looms outside the stall, just staring at them, and Ryan tells him to back off. A reasonable request, what with the sharing/caring thing. Apparently not, as Raheim storms over to James' room and starts loudly planning Ryan's downfall. When Mike says he doesn't want to get into this, Raheim tells him he's either with him or going home. See what I mean about cocky?

The thing is, all sorts of people have tired of Raheim. TD announces that his mouth will get him in trouble and says he's got to go. She spends a lot of time with the new guys laying the groundwork for that. Even James tells Mike he's getting tired of Raheim, and they're supposed to be best friends.

Raheim also tries to convince Stephanie that she's the "first lady" in the government, but that she has to be someone he can trust. As it is, she's "breaking up Camelot" by not being faithful to her roommate. He tries to act like he's looking out for her, but Stephanie is pretty sure he's completely nuts with his "crazy eyes and territory issues." Damn straight.

In another shift, the new guys get to choose roommates early on. The two men they displace will go to the single room together until the next roommate ceremony. Aaron picks TD, displacing Johnny. That's both smart (everyone hates Johnny) and natural, since he's obviously smitten with TD. Chris picks Stephanie, displacing Raheim. Whoo-hoo! Raheim keeps up with the crazy eyes while purporting to be calm - "that just means somebody's borrowing my room for a couple of days." Chris remains unintimidated. I remain hopeful that hypocritical, cocky Raheim will finally get the boot.

Other stuff:

  • When the new guys join lunch, Tanya mentions fingerpainting. Cut to Tanya in her room: "Finger painting and crushing... sex. Fingerpainting and crushing are terminology for sex." Thanks for clearing that up.
  • Did you catch the shot of the humping frogs as the ladies went down to lunch? Classy!
  • TD, who was pretty pissed off to see Charté go, revels in Raheim's discomfort on meeting Chris. "Ok, we have another black guy here, let the games begin!"
  • TD tells Aaron and Chris that she thinks she's the next woman to get booted. Personally, I think Krista is the next one to go. She may be "everyone's little sister," but she doesn't put out.
  • The guys refer to Stephanie as "Bigguns." Very nice.
  • Stephanie wants to talk philosophy with Ryan. Is that what the kids are calling it these days? I thought it was fingerpainting!
  • Charté leaves the new guys a letter telling them to trust no one. As they're not idiots, they're not terribly surprised.
  • The new guys are amazed that they get a little peep show (Stephanie and Ryan in the shower) their first night in the new place. "This is like voyeurism at Paradise Hotel," Chris says in (I hope) mock amazement. Yeah, that's kind of the whole point  of the show.
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