'Saturday Night Live,' 'Breaking Bad' and more of the best lines on TV this week

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The 2013 fall season is here, which means we have some great lines to choose from in the past week of television. From "Breaking Bad" to "Scandal" to "Saturday Night Live," here are 24 of the best quotes from the week of Sept. 29 through Oct. 5.

Warning: There are both spoilers and many things said by Miley Cyrus in this article.

"I did it for me. I liked it. I was good at it." - Walter White to Skyler, admitting why he cooked meth, on "Breaking Bad"

"Actually, I quite fancy you from time to time, when you're not yelling at me." - Captain Hook to Emma on "Once Upon a Time"

"Well, anal is what we need right now." - Peter Florrick on "The Good Wife"

"It's like trying to describe salt to someone who's never tasted salt." - Virginia, explaining a female orgasm to William, on "Masters of Sex" 

"That's smart. But mostly horrible." - Lance Sweets, about a killer who scattered body parts about town, on "Bones"

"You can't do that with clothes. Can you?" - Caroline, about a Kickstarter campaign for a new wardrobe, on "2 Broke Girls"
 
"The FBI works for me now." - Red Reddington on "The Blacklist" 

"I'm not a priest." - Maria (a kidnapper) to captive Brian Sanders, when he tries to explain his extramarital affair, on "Hostages"

"Apart from the fact that I'm dying, I'm fine." - Richard Castle on "Castle"

"I believe horses are from outer space." - Nick on "New Girl"
"I believe that too!" - Jess
"OK, good." - Nick

"Now Colton, you're crying. What are you crying about? ... Meaning you're quitting? Again? So Colton, you came back for a second time because you said, 'I've changed, I've grown and I want to show everybody.' You're now doing the exact opposite ... a very selfish move. ... I'm now convinced that Colton is the guy who never should've gotten off the couch. We brought a quitter back and we got a quit again." - Jeff Probst on "Survivor: Blood vs. Water"

"It's a strategic hot mess." - Miley, about her career these days, on "Miley: The Movement"

"Do you have any idea what it's like to run in heels? I have blisters, Damon!" newly human Katherine on "The Vampire Diaries"

"Well, I don't know about 'lair,' Erin." - CNN correspondent Jim Acosta to Erin Burnett on "Erin Burnett OutFront" (after she asked if President Obama would "stay in his lair")

"Why is everyone so bad at eating?" - Ron Swanson on "Parks and Recreation" 

"If you want to solve the mystery of who stabbed Koothrappali in the back with a weapon of indifference, it was all of you!" - Raj, when no one showed to his murder mystery dinner, on "The Big Bang Theory"

"My nipples are of no use to him" - Derek to Meredith, about their crying newborn, on "Grey's Anatomy"

"Couldn't we just kill another intern? It wouldn't be that hard." - Quinn on "Scandal"

"Are we gladiators? Or are we b****es?" - Harrison, to the Pope & Associates team, on "Scandal"

"Maybe you two should get a room." - McGarrett to Chin Ho, massively excited some high-tech equipment, on "Hawaii Five-0"

"If you want to put me on a leash, it better be diamond studded or you can kiss my a**." - Donatella to the creditors coming after her in "House of Versace"

"I'm having tiny strokes, yo!" - Miley Cyrus, explaining her tongue thing, on "Saturday Night Live"

"Turns out that Prime Minister Bieber was a fair and generous ruler." - Homeless Man of the Future, explaining why Canada survived the collapse of civilization, on "Saturday Night Live"

"She was murdered." - Miley Cyrus, explaining the fate of Hannah Montana, on "Saturday Night Live"


What were some of your favorite lines of the week?

Photo/Video credit: AMC
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