'Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains': Boston Rob collapses, Stephenie gets bullied

stephenie-lagrossa-survivor.jpg"Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains" sees Boston Rob have a scary collapse and the hothead side of James rears its ugly head, targeting Stephenie.

Villains
The torrential rains are back and the stupid Villains haven't made a shelter yet. Boston Rob is the only person with half a brain over there. Courtney comments that Boston Rob is their shining star and if he drops dead, they'll all die. Won't that turn out to be prescient!

Parvati, Courtney and Danielle bitch and moan about not getting "Colby and James and Tom." It's because you're VILLAINS, guys. Duh. Rob wanders off into the jungle for a break and passes flat out, it's scary. Jerri finds him and just goes, "Rob, talk to me. Rob?" It makes her look like a total idiot, frankly. Why isn't she yelling for help?

Probst and medical arrive. Rob doesn't really remember anything and he's crying and apologizing. He says, "It's getting the best of me and I love and respect it too much to not play." I have to think Rob is a little delirious right now because ... it's not like you're dying of cancer, dude. It's "Survivor!" He then says, "'Survivor' is my life," so that explains that.

Heroes
The Heroes are living in freaking Shangri-La compared to the Villains, but they are getting on each other's nerves, Rupert and Stephenie particularly. And that's all we see of the Heroes before the challenge. Weird.

Challenge
It's the giant crate challenge that spells out the tribe name challenge, which JT, Coach and Tyson have all played before, and it's for Reward and Immunity. The Heroes get out to an early lead (just like last time) and the Villains smoke them on the puzzle portion (just like last time). Interesting. They could've called this season Brawn vs. Brains instead of Heroes vs. Villains.

Jeff Probst: "James just WALKIN' that crate back." Again, Jeff Probst's man-crush on James is kind of cute and kind of gross.

Parvati takes a pretty severe shot to the head with the crate because Russell is a little over-zealous but she soldiers on. When the puzzle starts, the Villains are ON TOP of things. Boston Rob is the puzzle master and he hasn't even done this challenge before. The Heroes are totally befuddled with spelling their tribe name. ("Brains versus braawwwwnnnn," Andrea sing-songs.) James gets frustrated and just yells, "Shut up!" as the Villains win. James then has a bit of a meltdown. I'm remembering why I didn't particularly like him the first two times he was on this show. He's kind of a cry-baby/bully in buff good guy's clothing.

My boyfriend pipes up, "What is that quote from 'Spaceballs'... 'Evil will always triumph over good because good is dumb.'" Heee.

Post-challenge Villains
They are pumped about their shelter, while Russell is threatened by Rob's personality. Russell then goes tearing through the jungle after one of the wild chickens. The action shot of him running with that spear makes me cry with laughter. My boyfriend comments, "Shambo is in tears."

Post-challenge Heroes
JT is mad that nobody listened to him, seeing as how he's done that puzzle before. James is insisting they have "one damn voice" and they need to focus.  I am distracted by their shelter, with its thatched roof and ... is that a hot tub? Geez.

James seems adamant that Stephenie leave because she ... outlasted her whole tribe? Is that the thinking? That's weird. JT is torn on who to side with, saying that it was easy last week because everybody wanted Sugar gone. Maybe JT should've stuck with his post-coital deal with Sugar?

Tom wants to get Cirie and Candice to go with him, Stephenie and Colby to get out Amanda. Candice is unsure but Tom gives her a pretty good talking-to. He's so rational and dad-like, how could you not be swayed? Cirie and Candice appear to make an alliance because they're both on the outs.

Tribal Council
What's the music on the way to Tribal? It's like Christian Bale is going to swoop in and announce that he's Batman. It's awesome. Jeff takes the Heroes to task for not winning and James and Stephenie get into it. Rupert smirks because he doesn't like Steph, while James keeps calling her "baby." Oooh, that would make me want to punch him. He then calls it "romantic" that she outlasted her entire tribe.

Colby and Tom get their hackles up and defend Steph, calling James a bully. Oooh, I think Tom could beat down James something hard in many ways. There's a little talk about aligning with people from past seasons but then it moves to the vote.

The votes go Steph, Amanda, Steph, Amanda, Steph, Amanda, Steph, Steph. Wow, that's surprising and a bummer. I like her and I don't really care for Amanda. Plus, James is a total bully. When Steph leaves she says that the next time they lose a challenge, a little less cursing out your tribemates might help. James tells her to shut her mouth. Classy.

Thoughts & Tidbits
  • Man, my inkling for this season was that the Villains wouldn't gel and the Heroes would be superstars. I had that totally backwards.
  • I'm pretty proud of my "Brawn vs. Brains" renaming of the season. Just thought I'd mention that again. Hee.

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Photo credit: CBS


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