'Survivor' recap: Stuporbowl

jeff-probst-survivor-nicaragua-320.jpgThis season of "Survivor" takes place in Nicaragua, and our tribes are divided along age lines: people 40 and over in one tribe and people 30 and younger in the other. People 31-39, apparently, can go on some other reality show.

Probst insists on calling the tribe of over 40s "the older tribe," and it consists of a crazy fisherman, several grizzled no-nonsense women, and Dallas Cowboys Super Bowl-winning coach Jimmy Johnson. Because it just wasn't enough to give us the past three seasons of Douche, Li'l Russell, or both - we now have a guy who somehow manages to be both men in one while hogging the camera twice as much.

The younger tribe consists of a bunch of pretty people who are either stupid, have unappealing personalities, or both. They're happy enough to be with each other and not the ugly old people, until Kelly B. reveals that she has an artificial leg, which is such a buzzkill and makes everyone decide to get rid of her early so she won't get a million-dollar sympathy vote at the end of the game.

The young tribe also, thanks to Brenda, takes possession of the very cheesy "Medallion of Power," which they choose to give up to the old people in exchange for flint and fishing supplies. It turns out that the old people don't need flint, as they have Jane, who is apparently the only person on this show ever to actually practice making fire before the show began. Also, being an old person, she wears glasses, which makes fire-starting relatively simple.

The old people get a chance to use the Medallion of Power at the immunity challenge, where it will give them a slight advantage. They decide to hold onto the Medallion instead, and promptly lose. Back at camp, the votes appear to be split between Jimmy Johnson and Wendy, a flaky and aloof goat rancher. She decides to open up to her tribe at Tribal Council, when it's way too late anyway, but her insistence on what an awesome person and tribemate she is serves only to further alienate her and she's unanimously voted out.

Photo credit: CBS


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